Journey to Cow Bay

Okay... First, I have to tell you that the Terrace Writer's Association is called "The Flaiming Pens", which of course fits in with my theory of a queer conspiracy in northern BC.... Of course, it should be remembered that the city of Terrace is one of the few municipalities that forbids a gay pride parade! Oh, and today the Skeena Mall loudspeakers are playing selections My Fair Lady (incedentally, a favourite musical among local white supremecists).
The other day, my friend and I decided to journey to Prince Rupert. The drive from Terrace to Prince Rupert is supposed to be one of the 10 most beautiful in the world, and I don't doubt it. The mountains were covered with snow, and the trees white with frost. We sat in silence and listened to selections from Wagner's ring cycle... truly the only music appropriate for such an epic landscape. Upon reaching "Rupert" as it is known to the locals, I noticed a large bovine shaped sign with the words "This Way to Cow Bay". I was intrigued. You should know that cows are my favourite animal and always have been. In fact, when I was 10, a freind of the family made me a rocking chair emblazoned with cow spots, and complete with a tail made of rope. In fact, I now have 3 garbage bags full of cow memorabilia sitting in a crawlspace in Winnipeg.

So, we headed down the road, and suddenly I noticed that everything was painted with cow spots. The signposts, the garbage cans, even the mailbox. But why? Well, apparently, in 1909 Prince Rupert did not have a dock, so when the local dairy farmer ordered some cows from down south, they had to swim to shore after being unloaded. The name stuck, and the locals had nothing else to do, so they painted everything Holstein.
We went to a place called the Cow Bay Café, ordered Cowpuccinos, and I had a "Cowpie" (actually a coconut chocolate cookie... but it was rather slimy and brown). Best of all, the café is covered with photos of cows that people have sent from around the world. Oh, and the mascot of the café is a holstein named "Mean Millie"!
See, she lives on! Even better, our server assumed that my friend Ellie and I were a couple, so I gave her a meaningful look and said "its our anniversary". Well, we got our coffee for free...they were SO touched. I don't feel bad at all. If people are going to make assumptions, the least I can do is lie to them and get free stuff! Mean Millie indeed.